When Zita Christian’s husband, Dick, passed away from Alzheimer’s disease in July 2022, the first holiday season was profoundly difficult. Christian, 77, of Manchester, Connecticut, felt like a zombie, moving through tasks on autopilot while her emotions were raw. She spent her first holidays with her daughter’s family in Rhode Island, but avoided most festive activities, instead preferring to retreat into solitude.
“Grief felt intense, with tears always close to the surface. Simple triggers would bring a flood of emotions no matter where I was,” says Christian, host of the “My Spouse Has Dementia” podcast.
As time passed, the grief and loneliness didn’t vanish, but it became more bearable. Christian compares it to the formation of a pearl: An irritant that gets coated over time until the sharp edges smooth out. The second holiday season was a bit easier, and she looked forward to spending it with family.
